Written by:  Blumz…by JR Designs, Ferndale & Detroit

You’ve got the ring, you’ve set the date and now it’s time to talk flowers.   How do you find the right wedding florist for your special event?  Choosing the right blooms to decorate your very special occasion requires a few basic decisions and a few realizations.

First, be realistic with your budget and expectations. It’s ok to want your wedding to look like something out of Oprah’s magazine or Martha Stewart’s book, but that is only realistic if you have the bank balances that those two ladies have to work with. And even though there are “calculators” on web sites such as www.theknot.com that are supposed to tell you how much you should spend on flowers, cake, etc., these are only general calculations and are usually very minimal when compared to what young women often visualize for their weddings.

So how do you select the right floral source? Do you go with the well-established “wedding” flower shop or do you trust a friend or associate that likes to dabble in flowers and is willing to help you with yours as a favor?

Basically flowers can come from many sources. The source you select should be based on your expectations and needs.

Do you expect full service with several consultations, delivery, set up and rental items, or are you planning simple bouquets and flowers to wear that you or a friend can pick up the day of the event?

Are your tastes in reception flowers less complicated such as daisies in a simple vase or are you wanting raised and low centerpieces requiring a skilled and talented floral designer? Knowing the answer to these and many other questions requires you have a clear theme or “look” in mind and then selecting accordingly.

Here are a few questions that can help you in selecting the right florist/floral source for you and your budget.

Is the wedding formal or casual? More formal weddings usually require more experience and training of the florist. Their knowledge in design, materials, event planning, venue requirements, and execution of the plans is priceless to insure a less stressful and more beautiful event.

Casual weddings for the most part are not as “detail” oriented (unless it is a casual affair in theme but highly detailed and orchestrated in actuality). They may not require as much floral presence and therefore may only require minimal arrangements of non-structured design.

Are the flowers desired readily available with very few restrictions? If you are getting married in September and you REALLY want tulips, then you need to be dealing
with a professional florist that specializes in wedding and events. Yes, tulips are available in September if you are willing to accept the costs and their limitations.

However, there are certain things that you would need to be aware of when making those decisions that a professional floral designer would be able to assist you with.

If your flower requirements are very open to interpretation and you feel comfortable just going with what is available the week of the event, then you may not require the services of a traditional flower shop.

Is your budget very generous or restrictive?  The answer to this question is highly subjective and relative.

Whether your budget is generous or restrictive, a professional florist will be able to give you many suggestions on how to make that budget give you the most value for your dollar.

Never assume that you cannot afford a big name florist. Most are just as willing to work with a bride whose budget is slim as they are with a big ticket wedding. Simply ask if they have any minimum requirements and what your expectations are. Just remember, keep your expectations realistic.

After you have answered these questions, shop around. Do an on-line search of florists in your area and look at their web sites to get a feel for what they can do and have to offer. To what professional organizations and associations do they belong? What is their educational background and how many years experience do they have? Select the three that most fit what you are looking for and then contact them about setting up an appointment to meet with them.

As you meet the floral providers, treat the consultations like you would job interviews. Is this shop right for the job? Does their “look” reflect your style? Does the person you are speaking with understand your expectations?

Do they have a good reputation in the area for excellent work, personal service and professionalism? Are they able to provide references and vendor information besides just floral? What other services do they provide that may make it easier for you, such as linens, invitations, cakes, etc.?

Finally, go with the florist that you feel understands your desires, that are willing to work with your budget and with whom you feel a personal connection. When it really get down to it, when comparing apples to apples, most floral shops of comparable abilities, products and levels of service, will have comparable prices. It really does boil down to finding someone with whom you connect.

Once you find that floral shop, trust them and listen to their recommendations.
They are the professionals and have a professional stake in your wedding. Yes,
it is your day, but it is also their name on the flowers. Communication is crucial. Allow them to guide you in what flowers are in season, what designs are going to look best for a given situation, and how to make your wedding day as beautiful as possible.

Once you do that, relax and allow the professional to do what they do best. Enjoy
the day and know that you have selected the right florist for the job.

Aretha Franklin Is Engaged to Longtime Friend: MyFoxDETROIT.com

TresSugar / June 14, 2010 8:00 am

By Simon and Schuster AUTHORity

Because your wedding will be one of the most memorable days of your life, your behavior needs to reflect this. Learn what to do — and what not to do — on the big day from David Tutera of WE tv’s The Wedding Planner and author of My Fair Wedding: Finding Your Vision… Through His Revisions! It’s simply important that you come across to your guests as appropriate, sincere, and genuinely thankful that they are there to celebrate with you. Trust me, being a graceful bride will keep you from having any regrets five, ten, or fifty years from now. It will also keep your guests filled with memories of you as nothing less than charming, beautiful, and blushing. Remember, this party isn’t only about you; it’s about the bride and groom — and, of course, your guests! Follow these tips to ensure that you are the picture of elegance and grace at your wedding:

• Walk down the aisle with poise, and hold your bouquet by the stems with flowers tilted forward.

• Practice your wedding kiss and make sure it’s sweet, not raunchy.

• Make a mental note to avoid arm-pumping after the ceremony is complete. You’re getting married, not cheering for a high school football team! Walk back up the aisle together as the happy, elegant couple you are.

• Attend your own cocktail hour! When couples schedule photos during this time, they miss out on sharing those first few moments of newlywed excitement with their family and friends. Also, consider that couples often enter the reception room fifteen minutes after guests have entered, so missing cocktails as well as the start of the reception means a lot of time away from guests.

• Make a point to look into the eyes of your guests when talking to them – this is good etiquette anytime.

• At the reception, visit each table and greet guests individually. If possible, try to visit with each guest at least twice during the evening. It’s no different than if you were hosting a dinner party at home — you want everyone to feel welcome.

• Always mingle with guests with your new husband at your side.

• Neither you nor your groom should ever be seen smoking or drinking beer from a bottle rather than a proper glass. You’re not at a sports bar!

• Pace yourself when drinking wine or cocktails – no one wants to see a tipsy bride or groom. You don’t want to wind up on Brideszillas!

• Hold your champagne glass by the stem, not the bowl to keep the champagne chilled. And always have a glass within reach for toasts.

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By Rachel Gillman, Glamour magazine

Being a bridesmaid is an honor, but it’s also a commitment. Just like the bride, you’re investing in a dress, setting aside time for wedding activities and playing a pivotal role in the wedding ceremony. Some brides appreciate the effort, and some (who shall remain nameless) take it for granted. For all you brides-to-be, make sure you’re in the former category with these tips from bridesmaids who have walked the aisle so many times they could practically star in 27 Dresses.

No, your bridesmaids will NOT wear that dress again.
“Never pick a dress that’s a fortune and justify it by saying, ‘Oh, but you’ll wear it again’—she won’t,” says Melissa, 28, from Minneapolis, who has been in six weddings. Yes, it’s your wedding and your chance to make a fashion call for all your friends, but you should consider the three C’s: cost, color and cut. Ask your bridesmaids for their budgets and pick a dress you love at a price they all can afford. Another tip from Melissa: “Don’t choose a dress that has 75 layers. It’s an alternation nightmare and will end up costing more than the dress.”

Don’t make unreasonable demands of your bridesmaids.
There are legendary war stories of outrageous bride demands. At all costs, avoid becoming a cautionary tale. “I have one friend who told us that we could not be pregnant at her wedding,” says Melissa. For Erica, 27, another six-time bridesmaid, the request was painful. “We were not allowed to take our shoes off and change into flip-flops during the reception!” Instead of mandating that your friends highlight their hair, dance in stilettos or postpone pregnancy, make a list of the top three things you value most and then run it by a non-bridesmaid friend for a reality check.

Before you say “I do,” say “thank you” to your bridesmaids.
An unofficial estimate for the cost of being a bridesmaid? About $1,000. Before you walk down the aisle, take the time to thank your wedding party. They love you, they’re happy for you, and they’re thrilled to see you get married. But don’t forget to acknowledge the time and expense of attending your shower, bachelorette party and dress fittings, along with the countless phone calls, e-mails and errands that come with the territory. Five-time bridesmaid Nicole, 30, says, “Recognize that your bridesmaids are doing something for you by standing up in your wedding. It’s so touching to be asked to be a part of someone’s wedding, but by agreeing to stand up, I realize it’s committing to much more than just one day—it’s promising to play a big part throughout the entire year, and it’s nice for that to be acknowledged.”

Let your bridesmaids express themselves.
As the bride, you’re entitled to ask for an identical appearance. But if you don’t care about cloned bridesmaids, why not celebrate their differences? When it comes to hair, shoes or jewelry, talk to your wedding party and figure out how everyone can look—and feel—her best. For Mary, 29, it was letting every bridesmaid pick a different color shoe. “I think it’s really important to let your bridesmaids show their personality. My wedding party was from across the country and it was fun to let that uniqueness shine through.” Nicole adds, “If everything is so specifically dictated, it can feel more like you are a prop in the room than one of the bride’s best friends.”

Don’t ask for too much of your bridesmaids’ time.
Be aware of how much time you’re asking friends to devote to your big day, from wedding dress shopping to a four-day bachelorette weekend. If your bridesmaids have to sync their BlackBerrys to keep up, scale back on the number of events and ask them to attend only the most important ones. “I’ve been in weddings where I literally was booked solid every weekend leading up to the wedding. I was dying to just have time to do what I wanted to do,” says Kirby, 27, a five-time bridesmaid. And after standing up in six weddings this year, Brittany, 25, begs, “Don’t expect your bridesmaids to go to multiple showers. They can handle only so many tissue-paper games and spatula discussions.”

You don’t need an army of bridesmaids.
Bigger isn’t always better when it comes to your wedding party. You might feel obligated to include your best friend from preschool, your favorite coworker and your fiance’s cousin, but you shouldn’t pass the bridesmaid baton out of guilt. Instead, ask only the women in your life you truly consider your closest friends. “Be selective and ask only your very closest friends to stand in your wedding,” says Kirby. “There is nothing wrong with having only one or two attendants. More often than not, girls will be relieved not to be asked.”

Always give your bridesmaids a plus-one.
If you have single friends standing up in your wedding, be sensitive to their feelings and dating situation. Bridesmaid consultant and blogger Michelle advises, “As a bridesmaid, bringing a date should always be presented as an option.” Even if she’s unattached, it’s important to offer each wedding party member a choice. As the engaged friend, don’t forget to be sympathetic and see beyond the white dress to the friends holding your train along the way.

When it comes to bachelorette parties, keep your bridesmaids’ budgets in mind.
What started as one night of revelry can morph into a jam-packed weekend of activities, usually involving one or more of the following: lingerie gifts, multiple dinners, interactive classes, Jell-O shots, penis paraphernalia and a Sunday brunch. Needless to say, bachelorette parties also entail hours and hours of planning and hundreds of dollars. Ask most bridesmaids about bachelorette parties and they’ll admit it’s a double-edged sword. Raucous, raunchy and fun…but also stressful, time-consuming and expensive. “Know your bridesmaids,” says “Michelle. “If you have a really ritzy group of friends who love to party and have no problem dropping a couple grand going to Miami or Vegas, by all means let them spend their vacation time on something they’ll enjoy. On the other hand, if your friends are more low-key and budget-conscious, then you should keep that in mind as well.”

Feed your bridesmaids.
Even if you’re on a gluten-free vegan diet until you’re legally wed, keep in mind that well-fed bridesmaids are happy bridesmaids. “I almost passed out once from lack of food and water,” says Nicole. Sandwiches, snack trays and beverages are three must-haves, especially if getting ready is an all-day affair. For a celebratory touch, serve mimosas to lighten the mood—especially because at least one bridesmaid is guaranteed to hate her hair.

Remember what it feels like to be a bridesmaid.
Almost every bride was once a bridesmaid, so don’t forget what it felt like to stand in those pricey dyed-to-match shoes. Remember the weddings you enjoyed the most and how the bride treated everyone involved. As someone who has worn 10 bridesmaids dresses and once attended three weddings in eight days, I’ve seen bridal behavior run the gamut. My best advice is to cherish the friends in your life who were there before you met Mr. Right and the ones you want to be there after your big day. Make your wedding a priority—but not more than the people you’ve chosen to be in it.

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